Alien Inside
by Chien
Summary: Zim gets suspicious. Dib broods over his own problems. And Gir sings a song from the summer of love.
1. The Argument

Hi!  I came up with this idea last spring, but due to a lot of **** going on in my life I was unable to write it down.  Until now.  Let me stress that when I came up with this idea a lot of things weren't clear yet on the show, so it is full of inaccuracies.  Rather than sacrifice story quality, or even give it up altogether, I decided to leave them there.  Deal.

**Yes for a very long time I thought Gaz was Dib's OLDER sister.**

P.s.  I own nothing.

*

            It was another night at Dib's house.  He was exited.  Mysterious Mysteries was on in ten minutes.  It was a brand new episode, and tonight there would be an expert explaining some techniques on how to capture an alien.  Dib would bet ten bucks that he had tried most of them already, but maybe he could get some ideas on how to capture Zim.  There was however a problem.

            Gaz was in the middle of playing 'Piggy Hunter IV: The Wrath of Bacon'.   

Why did Dib have to bug her in the 'Dangerous Pork Tenderloin' level?

It was bad enough that She had to share the same house with him.  But why did he have to bother her about his dumb TV show?  Ok, so 'Mysterious Mysteries' was occasionally interesting, but so was a root canal.

            "And now we bring you Dr. Chuck Vondermond, alien catching expert.."  

Gaz turned the volume up on her GameSlave.  She didn't want to hear this quack drone on about aliens.  Why her brother was into this crap she would never know.  Beside the point, who said all aliens were bad.

            "Gaz, could you turn that thing down?"  She turned the volume all the way up.

"Can't you play that in the other room?! I've been waiting all week for this!"  "Most comfortable seat in the house."  "Move!"  "Tough."    

Dib turned the volume on the television up.  "Wow doctor!  Yorkshire pudding!"  "Can't you use the other TV?"  "This one is big screen!"  Dib was yelling so he could be heard over the television and GameSlave.   "So what!  Go!"  "You go!"  Gaz, without looking up from her GameSlave, yanked the remote from Dib's hand.  She shut the television off.  "GAAAZZZ!!!!!"  "You deserved it. Dork."

            It was then that Dib did perhaps the bravest thing (or the worst mistake) of his life.  He grabbed for the remote.  Gaz held it away from him, but instead Dib's hand found the GameSlave.  He grabbed that instead.  "Let go Dib."  "No!" The GameSlave went back and forth like a tug-o-war rope.  "Dib, Let go now Or I will make you regret the day you were born!"  "NN..Nnever!"  Gaz pulled, and then as Dib pulled back she let go.  Dib fell back square on his behind.  As he fell however, he lost hold of the GameSlave.  As it hit the floor a tiny, almost insignificant crack appeared on the corner of the screen.  

            "You.. are.. so.. DEAD!" Gaz started slowly walking towards Dib, anger on her face.  "Of all the people in this world, I had to get stuck with you for a half-brother!" 

"Half-brother??  Yea right!  Nice try Gaz!"  Dib stood up rubbing his sore behind.

Gaz stopped.  "Yes, half-brother!  You heard me Dib."  She took a single step forward.

She clasped her skull necklace.  "Don't believe me?  I have proof!"

*

This ends the first chapter.  I know it is short and schizophrenic but trust me, with more chapters it will make sense.  Useless Trivia:  "_von der Mond_"  is German for "From the Moon".  Can you spot the really bad pun?  There is also a Moxy Früvous reference if you can find it.


	2. The Skull's Secret

Hiya! Here is chapter 2, in which we find out what Gaz means by 'Half- brother'.  
  
Special thanks to those who reviewed. If I get no reviews I think nobody reads my work. :( Keep up the good work!  
  
(Disclaimer): I still don't own Invader Zim. If I did, it would not be canceled. We Zim fans must pull together and think of a way to save our common obsession!  
  
*  
  
She clasped her skull necklace. "Don't believe me? I have proof!" Gaz hit a small button on the side of the skull and it swung open, revealing two small photographs. "That thing is a locket?!" Gaz rolled her eyes. "No Dib, it's a shoehorn." Dib blinked, and then took a close look at the photographs that the locket held.  
  
The first was an image of a man Dib didn't know. He had sloppy dark brown hair, and his light brown eyes held a goofy expression. It was the kind of photo that one would make in an old color photo booth. The man was holding up a cardboard sign. On it the words 'I Luv you' were written in black marker.  
  
The other was a picture of his mom and dad on their wedding day. This was taken as they were leaving the church. His parents were laughing, holding each other's hand. With his free hand Prof. Membrane was rubbing the head of a toddler who had managed to hitch a piggyback ride. Dib had often seen pictures of his mother. It was all he knew of a mother who had died shortly after his birth. But he couldn't immediately name that toddler. Then it hit him not unlike a ton of bricks. The little girl, with the same color hair as her mother, was none other than Gaz!  
  
Gaz pointed at the first photo. "He died before I was born. My earliest memory is of mom crying when I asked why I had no daddy. When I was really small all I wanted was a real family. A family, Dib." She tapped the other photo. "Then Mom and Dad got married. For a time I had my wish. I had parents who loved each other. I was their little princess!" She pointed at Dib. He took a step back, uncomfortable under Gaz's savage glare. "Then YOU came. She died because of you! Dad was so upset he buried himself in work. Soon he all but forgot I existed."  
  
Dib blinked. Gaz continued. "I had a family Dib. It was because of what Dad is, what YOU are, that it all fell apart. If you were a normal baby it might have been different, but NO! You had to be you! You ruined my life Dib!" Gaz grabbed the locket. "You might as well take the rest of my dream too!" She yanked the locket, and the cord easily snapped. Gaz threw the locket, and it skidded to a stop at Dib's feet.  
  
It was at this point that Prof. Membrane walked in. "What is going on in here? I heard a ruckus." Dib picked up the locket and held up the cord. "I'm… not… sure, Dad." The professor looked at the locket and then at Gaz. "Gaz, did you?" She looked solemnly up at him. "Yes Dad. I did." Prof. Membrane looked at her, sighed, and then said "Gaz, go sit in the kitchen. I will talk to you later. And leave your GameSlave here.." Gaz stormed out of the room yelling "Dib broke it anyway!" Dib yelled back "It's only a tiny crack!"  
  
"Son, sit down. I have the feeling your sister didn't tell you the whole story." To himself he muttered, "I was hoping to save him this until he hit puberty at least..." As he sat down Dib said "If it's about the birds and the bees, I know this one already." Prof. Membrane shook his head. "No son, it's just that then yo…" "I know dad! My body will change in strange and disgusting ways! Don't you have anything better to talk about?" Prof. Membrane shook his head and looked up. To no one in particular he said "I guess I really have to do this." He undid the top button on his lab coat. He sat next to his son on the couch and opened up his collar. And for the first time in his entire life, Dib really saw his father's face.  
  
*  
  
Here ends the second chapter... In chapter 3 we will get a more thorough explanation from Professor Membrane. What is the whole story? What does Prof. Membrane really look like? Is Chien really out of tonic water? Stay tuned to find out!  
  
Reminder: Please tell me what you think of the story so far and why you think it. 


	3. Membrane's Tale

Hello again! It is I, Chien. I am amazed that so many people like my Fan fiction! **Applauds faithful readers** Sadly from now on it will take me longer to write each chapter. Why you ask? Spring semester has started at my college. Fear not however! I will still write.  
  
(Disclaimer): I do not own Invader Zim. I am not writing fan fiction for profit, unless Zim gets put back in production and I get hired as a writer (I would LOVE that!)  
  
*  
  
And for the first time in his entire life, Dib really saw his father's face. And he sort of wished he hadn't. Just below where the collar had covered, Prof. Membrane's skin hung in tatters like cloth. The skin below was green. He had neither nose nor ears.  
  
He removed his glasses. His eyes were closed, but without the thick glasses Dib could see small tears in the skin around his father's eyes. Prof. Membrane tenderly pulled the tattered skin off his face like a mask, revealing a green face with antennae on top of his head.  
  
Prof. Membrane exhaled. "I suppose I ought to start at the very beginning." He opened his eyes, which turned out to be the color of garnets. "You see son, I am not from this planet. I was born far away, on a planet my people call Irk." He paused, before continuing, "Since Irkens no longer breed naturally except on rare occasions, I do not know who my parents are. I don't even know who I was cloned from."  
  
"Every Irken child is expected to do their duties from the moment of birth. After basic training, I went to the military academy for more specialized training. As I was good at flying, eventually I became a test pilot for the Irken military. It was my job to test the latest flyers for many things. I would usually fly maneuvers, land on a moon, test features such as disguise making and base building and the such, fly a few more maneuvers, report back to base and give a report. With my report the engineers would tweak out bugs, send the upgraded model back in for testing, and would produce the finished model for use by the military's elite fighters. But then there was an accident.  
  
We were pressed for time. The new Voot-Runners were needed for the upcoming `Operation Impending Doom', a mass of invasions if you will. But a small error was overlooked during the launch sequence. There was an explosion during the second stage. My ship was hurtled through space like a stone from a slingshot. The blast had knocked out both communications and guidance systems. I couldn't control where I was going, or call for help." Dib asked cautiously "But what does this have to do with me?" "I'll get to that son."  
  
"I had no control over the speeding spacecraft. It changed blindly into space for a few terrifying weeks. It finally stopped when it crashed into the side of a mountain here on earth. It was a miracle I survived. I waited by the wrecked craft for about two months, tending my wounds and hoping for rescue. It soon became apparent however that I would never go back. But I couldn't stay huddled in the wreckage forever. If hunger didn't kill me, than the weather would have.  
  
Not too far from the mountain was a farm. I watched the people there work, observing how they behaved. I had been able to do some repairs to the disguise system, so I made myself look human. With my disguise I sort of looked a bit like you, now that I think about it. With my ship I salvaged what little I could, and I buried the rest. I was going to make a fresh start on this planet.  
  
I migrated to the suburbs. Crowded enough to better learn the ways of my new home, yet not as congested as the city. Quite nice really. I made my home in a small abandoned house. The former occupants had left behind a broken old radio. After a few quick repairs I was able to learn quite a few things. Such as by the local calendar, the year was 1968. That was a war in a place called Vietnam. That vacationing in Canada was a popular thing for young American men to do. And that human children went to a place called `Skool' to learn how to survive this world. Now back then I was still relatively young, and was short (As is typical of my species.) With my disguise I resembled a human child. And Skool was the opportunity I needed to get my new life off to a good start. So I registered with a first name I thought was normal, `Professor'. For a surname I had kept the name from my old life. So I became Professor Membrane.  
  
I had no idea how human children behaved. I tried to behave my best, be especially nice and courteous. But with a name like `Professor' I quickly became the butt of a lot of jokes. The fact that I was a good student didn't exactly help either. I had nicknames like `Mem-Brainy'. Those were dark days indeed. But one girl was different than the other kids. She showed me what human friendship was. She became the closest friend I had ever had. Once I even told her my secret. She wasn't scared or repulsed. She thought it was the grooviest thing in the world, and she never told a soul.  
  
We grew up together. Yes even I grew as the years passed for I was still young enough to grow then and gravity is slightly lighter here. We stayed close friends through jr. high, even through High school. For a joke we even went to the prom together. However we were accepted into different colleges. After graduation we sort of lost contact with each other.  
  
By then I had grown to love this planet. I had made the decision to use my knowledge of advanced technology to try to help mankind. I became one of the top scientists in the country. Of course I wasn't able to do everything, I had to improvise at times. But still I was able to give mankind many wonderful things. I introduced a few Irken technologies to earth. I even invented a new kind of blender. However, I never could improve upon the toaster. Goodness knows I have tried, but the toast conundrum puzzles me to this day. The deliciousness...  
  
Forgive me son, I got a little sidetracked there. Anyway, a few years ago my career took me to live in New York. I arrived in New York, and when I wasn't working I would go for walks. My meanderings led me to central park, where I chanced to run into my old skool chum. We went to a little coffee shop to catch up with each other.  
  
She had become a widowed artist. Her husband Alexei had been killed in an accident after they were married only a little over a year. She was raising their little daughter alone. I told her what had been going on in my life. As we chatted we grew close again. And there was a something that had not been there before. We fell in love.  
  
After a few months of dating we were wed. We must have been the happiest couple in the galaxy. One can be happy in marriage if one's spouse is also one's best friend. Our new family moved to a house in the suburbs. We spent time with each other, going on dates, and doing fun things like going to the zoo with little Gazelle.  
  
We had been married about a year and a half when the seemingly impossible happened. Since your mother and I were of different species, we didn't think it was possible for her to become pregnant. And yet she was with child. Scans showed that the child she carried was a unique blend of human and Irken blood. Dib, my son, that child was you." "Me?" Dib paused. "But that would mean that I.." "Yes son. You are part Irken. Half human, half alien."  
  
Dib was shocked. And yet, it somewhat made sense. The arm control nerve in his belly, the bologna DNA being able to temporarily turn him into a sausage, his new knowledge could somewhat explain a lot of things.  
  
"I delivered you in my lab. You were such a beautiful baby, but one look at you and one could tell you were not entirely human. Pale green skin, tiny antennae, though you were cute as a button you never would have survived in the human world with your semi-Irken features. I would have to make you look as human as possible. Unfortunately the repairs on my disguise device had not been able to stand the test of time. I was left with no other choice than to make one for you out of my own disguise. I cut pieces from my disguise, and designed one for you. It enlarged features like your ears. It gives you some family semblance to Gaz. It lets your hair grow, yes that is your own hair. I had to remove your antennae, and give you a hormone to prevent them from regenerating quickly. They will eventually grow back some day. Your human DNA gives you resistance to pure H20, but the skin I gave you gives you extra protection.  
  
The entire disguise was designed to last until you reached puberty. The antennae regeneration inhibitor hormone will have completely worn off by then. The skin from my disguise will not be able to withstand the rapid growth experienced during that time. It will tear from the stress, revealing your real skin below. Your mother and I felt that by that time you would be mature enough to understand your heritage. And surely by that time I would figure out how be able to make a more durable disguise for you."  
  
A sudden look of intense sadness came over Membrane's face. "But there were unforeseen consequences, that even I could not have imagined. A simple chemical enzyme is released in Irken children to protect their new systems during the stresses of birth. To most humans it is completely harmless, but your mother had an allergic reaction. A week after your birth she became seriously ill. The enzyme had poisoned her bloodstream. I did what I could to save her, but by that time it was too late. If I had only caught it 24 hours earlier she could have.." He sobbed. "She died in my arms. Her last words were `Look after our children..' I did love her you know. When she died, I think a part of me died with her."  
  
Membrane stopped to collect himself. After a long pause he sighed. "I have tried to keep that promise to your mother. I'd say I've not been that bad of a father." "Yea, But most dads spend time with their kids. I'd say we kind of raised ourselves." Membrane retorted, "Don't blame me! We don't even HAVE parents where I'm from anymore." He sighed again. "I guess I just don't know much about how to be a parent. You know, I was kind of counting on your mother to teach me that stuff."  
  
They sat together for a while. Even though it did make a little sense, Dib still had a hard time stomaching the information his father had shared. "I'm sorry you had to find out like this." Silence. "I'd better go talk to your sister. Will you be okay son?" Dib nodded absentmindedly. Membrane stood up. He picked his face off the coffee table. He stood up. "Are you sure you are okay?" "Fine dad." When his father left the room, Dib sighed. Here he was, the protector of the human race. And it turns out that the whole time he wasn't exactly human. The idea was going to need some getting used to.  
  
*  
  
So? Do you like it (if so tell me why!)? If it's any consolation whatsoever, this story ain't over yet. 


	4. An Abnormal Skool Day

Howdy y'all! Did you miss me? *Crickets chirp* I'll pretend that was a yes.  
  
I would like to thank my reviewers, without whom I probably would not have written this chapter. Please continue your support. I would like to answer your questions, but I fear that would give too much of the plot away. Eventually they should be answered. Just not now. This chapter was really hard for me to write because I usually try hard to keep the characters 'in character'. And it is a known fact that when one experiences a change in one's life (such as finding out one's father is an alien) one is likely to act a little different than normal. So it is a conundrum trying to make Dib in character, acting not like himself a bit. Remember what he is going through. Then maybe it will make more sense to you.  
  
Disclaimer: I am not, nor was I ever, Jhonen C. Vasquez.  
  
*  
  
The bell rang, signaling yet another dull day at skool had begun. Ms. Bitters was not looking forward to spending another day suffering the child- stench her miserable class gave off. She sat behind her desk. Any moment they would come streaming in her classroom. Yes, here they were coming through her door. Just like clockwork.  
  
She stood up. "Sit down class." She began pacing the front of the room. "Open your filthy textbooks to chapter twelve as I call attendance." Suddenly she stopped pacing. Something had caught her eye. At first she didn't think she had actually saw it, but she turned her head and there it was. Today, Dib was on time.  
  
Indeed, Dib wasn't himself today. He was still trying to come to terms with what his father had told him the night before. "Well, It seems Dib has decided to grace us with his presence today. For what do we owe the honor?" He looked up. Ms. Bitters was standing directly in front of his desk. He looked around. Now that they had noticed his presence, his classmates seemed surprised.  
  
His attention was brought back to Ms. Bitters when she said, "What's the matter? Bigfoot not out today?" He looked straight at her. "So my paranormal research usually makes me a little bit late. I don't see why it is such a big deal if I don't feel much like researching today." He quipped.  
  
Ms. Bitters was taken aback. Quite frankly she wasn't even expecting a response.  
  
"Normally I would give you detention for talking back to a teacher. But seeing as you are really annoying, I'm sending you to see the skool psychologist. Maybe they can fix you." When he didn't move she pointed at the door. "Now!" she said. Dib sighed. It didn't seem like today was going to be his day. He was so preoccupied, that as he was leaving the room he didn't notice the look on Zim's face.  
  
"Didja hear? That freak Dib was actually on time to class today!" It was lunchtime. Dib's lack of tardiness seemed to be the main topic of discussion. "Whoa! Dib? On time? You must be kidding!"  
  
Dib himself however, had spent the entire morning in the skool psychologist's office. First he had had to wait for the skool psychologist to show up. That wait took a while. Then with the rest of the morning, he answered stupid questions with blatant lies.  
  
He knew very well that if one wasn't in immediate danger of committing suicide, the psychologist wasn't going to care much about what one said.  
  
And yet there was something on Dib's mind. He sighed and looked down at his ham and cheese sandwich. He had tried to save the human race from an alien menace, but in a twist of irony it turned out that he himself was, like it or not, part alien himself.  
  
He thought back. Yes he did have memories of an alien spaceship. But what if it was only his father's lab? That was so long ago that his memories of the experience were hazy at best. And yet, the more he thought about it the more plausible it seemed. He remembered bright lights, and lying on a clean table. That was definitely possible in his dad's lab. He couldn't see well, but whatever it was had antennae just like the ones he now knew rested on his father's head. He remembered the large being doing something around his cranial area. Antennae removal perhaps? Until now he had thought the alien was trying to create a super baby. He smiled a little. In a sense that was what his father was trying to do.  
  
Dib was awoken from his musings by the sensation of something being pressed between his eyes. Dib looked up to see Zim holding a small water pistol to his face. "What do you want Zim?" "I want you to be writhing in pain as I prepare to be lord of all humans." "Can't this wait?" Zim leaned in close so that only Dib could hear him.  
  
"I have a plan earth-boy. Soon your pitiful home will feel the full force of my planet's mighty wrath." The truth was, Zim had no real plan. He was hoping that his bluff would catch Dib off guard. Zim was hoping that by making Dib think he had a plan, Dib would get presumptuous, thus Dib would inadvertently give him a plan. It would actually make his statement a self-fulfilling prophecy. Zim was amazed at his own cleverness.  
  
Imagine Zim's surprise however, when Dib said, "I don't know where you are from Zim, and I'm sure your plan is very nice. But please..." Dib gently nudged the water pistol away from his face and stood up. "I'm not in the mood right now okay?"  
  
The bell rang, signaling the end of recess. Dib slowly walked for the door.  
  
"Maybe some other time." He called out without looking back. Zim watched him walking away, his jaw dropped and he was still aiming the water pistol where his enemy's face was.  
  
*  
  
So…? What did you think? Please review and let me know.  
  
Announcement: It was during the writing of this chapter that the author's doggie, best friend, and confidante Spike went to eternal paradise. She will be sorely missed by all who knew her. 


	5. Introspection & Espionage

Hello! No I am not dead!! I can't believe it myself that the last update was way back in   
March and its already August! I have a valid excuse however. A: I was depressed over   
losing my best friend. (Thank you all so much for your condolences BTW. I appreciate   
it very much. I still miss Spike very much.) And B: I had to work very hard to get my   
High School diploma. I did it though. I tell ya it isn't easy to be in High School and   
Collage at the same time!!   
  
Wow that was off topic.  
  
Anyway, please enjoy this installment of "Alien Inside".  
  
Disclaimer: Invader Zim is owned by Jhonen Vasquez. "Happy Together" is copyright   
1967 by The Turtles.   
  
  
*  
  
"Imagine me and you, I do. I think about you day and night. It's only right to   
think about the pig you love…" "Gir." "and squeeze it tight." "Gir…" "So happy   
TOGETHEEEEEEER!" Gir was dancing around in Zim's lab, holding a small live pig   
high above his head. He was singing rather loudly, that last word being rather high-  
pitched. Zim really didn't appreciate the robot's antics. "GIR!" "Yes?" In paying   
attention to his master, he didn't notice he was losing his grip on the pig, and thus   
dropping the pig behind him. The pig gave a loud annoyed oink at this, because he really   
disliked smashing face first onto the floor.  
"Stop that noisemaking!" Zim was exasperated. But it wasn't very long at all   
before he said "He's planning something Gir! I can smell it." His brilliant half-plan had   
failed. Zim figured that his enemy must be planning something. "But what is it." What   
was that earth boy trying to pull?  
"I must know!" "So… Why don't you ask him?" "What?!" Zim shot a look at   
Gir. Gir was sitting on the floor wrapping the pig's face with a gauze bandage. "You   
know silly! Go over to Dib's house and ask." Zim pondered this for a moment. "It   
might be a trap." "But you'll never know if you don't go! Duh!" By now the pig's head   
was wrapped like a mummy. Only the eyes and the mouth were still visible. Gir started   
to wrap the rest of the pig.  
Zim was considering the words of his neurotic robot. Gir had a point. Zim made   
a decision. Zim started to gather a few supplies. "I shall go to the Dib-human's house. I   
will be prepared for any possible trap that earth-monkey may have. But I will do more   
than simply find out about his plan. Oh yes, much more. For you see Gir, I will not only   
discover what his plan is, but I shall sabotage it."   
At the thought of sabotaging Dib's plan, Zim laughed. The maniacal laughing  
looked like fun, so Gir joined in. "Gir!" "Yes!" "I will need you to guard the base while   
I'm gone. This whole thing may just be a ruse to lure me away from the base. However I   
suspect it is a far greater scheme than simply that. Never the less, I need you to make   
sure that absolutely no one enters the base until I return. Understand?" "Yes master!"  
Zim donned his disguise. He, Gir, and the pig rode the lift to the main level. "If I   
call for back-up, make sure the base is secure first. Now…" by this point they were at the   
front door. Zim put a hand on the doorknob. He pointed his other finger in the air and   
exclaimed "I'm off!" With that said he left.  
Gir stood looking at the door for a minute. He put his green dog disguise on. He   
strapped on a pair of faerie wings. Gir looked to his friend, who was completely wrapped   
in gauze bandages. "Let's go to a nightclub Pig!"  
  
Dib had spent that afternoon still trying to sort the thoughts in his head. He knew   
that most humans went through an identity crisis during their adolescent years. What   
would his be like? Come to think of it, he was going through one now.  
Who was he? Dib had thought he had known. But with the information his father   
had shared, Dib didn't know any more. At least he knew he was not entirely inhuman.   
And at least his father wasn't an evil kind of alien scourge like Zim was. But the concept   
of an alien that was not trying to take over the earth was new to Dib.  
Out of curiosity, Dib had even taken an x-acto knife to the back of his left hand.   
He wanted to see if the part about him having a false skin was true. Dib realized this was   
stupid however, when all he saw was blood. (Not to mention it hurt like the dickens!)   
His father had helped him bandage his hand.  
"You shouldn't go hacking your disguise apart son." Membrane chided. "Of   
course it has limited regeneration capabilities, you could scrape your knee and not ever   
see your real skin. But it is not indestructible. I have already told you it will eventually   
tear apart. I haven't been able to come up with a way to make a more durable disguise   
you yet, never mind for myself. It is because I haven't been able to make a new disguise   
for myself that I must wear a lab coat with such a high collar. I don't mind so much as it   
is similar to my old pilot's uniform, but there are times I wish I could just wear a plain   
old t-shirt. I have no idea how much of your disguise will be left intact. If you are   
extremely lucky you might be able to dress normally, just you'd need gloves. Or at   
worse it will be completely useless." Membrane finished bandaging his son's hand, and   
then patted him on the head. "But that is still a few years away son. I have some work to   
do, so why don't you rest for now and maybe later go play outside."   
Dib thought about what his father had said. Up until now he had not thought   
about what this all meant for his future. Just how bad would the damage to his skin   
eventually be? Would he have to cover up so much he had to move to Siberia? If he was   
part Irken, would he still be able to fulfill his dream of being a paranormal investigator?   
Was there work for paranormal investigators in Siberia? He was sure if his father was   
able to pose as human, surely he would be able to overcome the difficulties his situation   
presented right? Dib wasn't so sure. And all this extra worrying he had been doing was   
giving him a headache. He lay back on the couch, and fell asleep.  
  
That evening Dib was awoken by the doorbell. He didn't want to get up off of the   
couch. It rang again. "Would somebody get that!" He heard is sister yell from upstairs.   
He sighed. The doorbell rang yet again. "Fine! I'll get it!" He reluctantly stood up and   
went to the door.   
As soon as Dib had the door open a crack, it was violently shoved open. The   
force sent him flying backwards, landing on his behind for the second evening in a row.   
Standing in his front doorway, was Zim. "Allright Dib." Zim said. He slammed the door   
without even glancing behind him. "I know you are up to something." "What the hell   
are you talking about Zim?" Zim took a step towards Dib. "You know what I mean stink   
monkey!" Dib slowly stood up. "Uhh, no. I don't actually." "I am not toying with you   
Dib! You will tell me now!" Zim was now walking to Dib again. "I don't know what   
you are talking about! Get the hell out of my house!" "You lie! You will tell mee!"   
Zim hollered this as he dove at Dib, pushing him to the ground. "That's it Zim! It's go   
time!"   
Thus started a rough round of wrestling between Zim and Dib. Even after ten   
minutes it was not clear who would eventually be the victor. While Zim was attempting   
to choke Dib with his own trench coat, Dib attempted to scratch out Zim's contacts. It   
was a mess. They rolled around on the floor trying to annihilate each other. But in   
reality they were looking like fools.  
"Dib, I know you are still a little upset so I've brought you some milk and.." Dib   
and Zim halted their scuffle as Prof. Membrane walked in from the kitchen bearing a   
tray. Prof. Membrane also stopped talking abruptly when he saw the two on the floor.   
Zim was straddled on Dib's back and pulling on Dib's scythe like hair, his own wig   
dangerously askew. For his part Dib had his teeth clamped around Zim's left ankle.   
Prof. Membrane was so stunned to see them paused is this awkward position that he   
dropped the tray. "...cookies."  
  
*  
  
Wasn't that fun kids? Lets do it again real soon. Of course if you can't wait that long   
you could read my other fics. *Shameless Plug*   
Did you know?: Rejected titles for this story include "I, Membrane" and "The Legend of   
Invader Mem". There was even a rejected chapter where Membrane takes Dib to Join   
AA. That's right, Aliens Anonymous! 


End file.
